A Country Divided

I like to keep the blog updates to our goings on here in India... keeping you guys, our friends and family, near and far, updated on our journey.  For a while now, though, I have noticed the severe division among my home country, the United States of America and I feel like it's time to share.  I am proud to be an American.  I am proud to be a Texan.  I am not proud, however, of the way our country has been behaving and treating each other lately.  It makes my heart so sad to see my Facebook feed filled up with people who hate another group of people for one reason or another: they are black, they are white, they are gay, they are Christian, they are Muslim, they are overpaid, they don't work, they are under-involved, they are over-involved, they eat a chicken sandwich from a place I choose to boycott, they travel to Florida when they shouldn't support such a state, and so much more.  Part of me wants to take a break from FB because it's draining.  It's emotional.  It's sad.  But, being across the ocean, that is not a good option for me. I still want to see the great photos of my friends and their families.  I want to see vacation pictures.  I want to know the great thing that happened to my FB friend that day.  I want to see the margaritas and glasses of wine.  I want to feel like I am still "in the loop" and not miss out on important updates such as engagements, pregnancies, graduations and so on.  So I will muddle through the hate and pray for my great nation.  Maybe I'll start commenting on each link or post I see with a negative connotation and remind the poster that LOVE is the answer.  
1 Peter 4:8 tells us: Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. (NIV)
I haven't always lived by this, personally.  There was a time a few years back when I was a bitter, angry and hateful person.  I am so thankful God allowed my u-turn and I am now a positive, happy, loving person.  Of course there are days, times and individuals that put my loving nature to the test, but I make the choice to work every day at it.  Some days are easier than others.  Some people are easier than others.  But I realize it's less about them and more about me.  The more difficult they are, the kinder I should be.  Imagine if we, across the world, all practiced more love and less hate.  Imagine if we, as parents, taught our children more love and less hate.  Imagine if we, as Americans, chose more love and less hate.  You don't like the president?  Pray for him and your nation.  You don't like that a jury did not come to the same conclusion that you did based on the evidence?  Pray for them and the defendant.  Don't forget the victim's family, while you are at it.  You don't like people who practice another religion than you?  Pray for them.  You don't like someone because of their skin color?  Pray for your eyes to see past their skin and into their heart.  
We all make mistakes.  We all make bad decisions.  We all have hurt or offended at least one person in our lives.  Imagine if every mistake, bad decision or hurt we ever made hung over our head and an entire group of people hated us for it.  What a terrible feeling.  We have to let the hate go.  We have to love each other, for all our imperfections.  
I am not saying that we should not be outraged at the mistreatment of people, an unjust justice system, or whatever issue(s) you are passionate about - and that your opinion should not be voiced or shared... but think of how many more people will listen if you voice it with love instead of hate.  
Remember to love your neighbor, near and far.  
OK, off my soapbox for the night.  Sending LOVE and hugs from Chennai.  Hoping you are sending them out from your little place in the big world, as well. 

Gonna need a do-over for this One-Year Anny...

Today.  One year since we left Houston - July 10, 2013.  Technically we did not arrive into Chennai until July 11, which is a good thing.  July 10, 2014 pretty much sucked.  We are going to make July 11 better. And the rest of 2013 and onto the next year.  At the end of the day, all I can do is laugh.  Some of it was pretty amusing... AFTER the fact.  At the time, not really funny.  But we have found that happens a lot here in India.  Not funny in the moment, hysterical looking back on it later.  Let me give a recap of the day's highs and lows:

• As a special treat, Savannah's teacher ordered her lunch.  Very sweet gesture.  Too bad she found a fly in her food about half way through eating.  Gross. 
• I woke up to get ready to take the kiddo to dinner before heading into work and went to put a load of laundry in the washer.   I have noticed red streaky stuff inside the fabric softener slot before and have been baffled, but it's inconsistent.  Confusing.  Until today when I noticed it again.  I began looking around and noticed the containers on the top of our fridge...  2 small Crystal Light drink drop bottles that Michael brought for us from the US.  Turns out our helper has been using some Crystal Light to soften our clothes.  Lovely.  Communication barriers are usually fun after the fact.
• I finished getting ready and we made our way to dinner.  I got in the car and started the usual - checking emails, checking FB.  I find out a dear friend's brother, who has been battling cancer for over 3 years, has passed away.  I am heart-broken for her.  Savannah knows and is very quiet.  We are silent nearly the entire way to the restaurant.  Prayers for the family are appreciated.
• Savannah wanted American so we went to one of our usual haunts: Tryst.  We walked around the bend and saw a garden-area full of chairs facing a large white screen... Hmmm... We walked in and all the tables were gone.  They were replaced with chairs facing yet another large white screen.  I asked the guy standing out side the door if they were closed.  When I really looked at him, I realized he wasn't the owner as I had thought, but some random white guy.  Savannah was humiliated.  I giggled, said, "Oh, you're not the guy.  Sorry" and walked in.  I then asked the staff and they said they were closed.  Ugh.  Savannah went into instant pouting and cranky mode (I wonder where she gets that from?).  I asked her to pick somewhere else.  She refused.  We stood there with a slight stare down and I caved.  Fine.  Thalapakati it is.
• We drove a couple KM down the same street and made our way to Thalapakati.  As we pulled up to the parking area, we noticed an apparent lifeless body laying from the street and into the parking lot.  I gasped and noticed a few people milling around, but nobody paying any mind.  "Is he dead?" I ask aloud, knowing I would not get an answer.  "Someone is going to hit him."  Again, knowing my driver can't understand me and Savannah has already thought the same.  
• There is a red car leaving the parking area.  But it's kind of in the street, in the lot, and our driver is going around it.  Then it decides to go.  Our driver has to slam his brakes.  And then we feel a thud from behind.  A family on a motorcycle has hit the rear of our little car.  Out gets the driver, grumbling and mouthing off under his breath.  He stomps over to the bike and begins to speak very sternly, not quite yelling, but using a lot of hand motions, so he might as well have been yelling.  He is laying into the bike man, all the while the wife is on the rear and his two children, toddlers, are on the front.  People are now stopping and telling our driver (I am going to ad lib since I can only understand the tone and gestures) DUDE, Chill OUT! and Calm down, buddy.  Everyone's OK.  
• We make our way into the restaurant.  We order the usual meal for us crazy Americans.  We mix rice and gravies and naan.  We live on the wild side.  (Usually it's rice OR naan, never both.)  I ask the waiter to make sure our gravy, paneer butter masala, is less spicy.  Savannah still can't deal with spice very well.  He smiles and says, "No, maam, not spicy.  Sweet."  I smile back and say, "Yes, less spicy, please."  We know what it is and we know how spicy it is, I am thinking.  "No, maam.  Sweet."  Yeah, OK.  I am getting nowhere fast. "OK fine."  Savannah and I exchange glances, knowing we will need to send it back when it comes.  Sigh.  
• We wait on our food and watch the lifeless body.  Nobody has moved it.  He is going to get run over, already dead or not.  Then his foot moves.  Ah!  He's alive!  We both see it and are a bit relieved.  But he is STILL halfway in the road.  MOVE HIM PEOPLE!  Busses are whizzing by, blaring a horn like that on a cruse ship.  HOW can he be sleeping? 
• Food comes.  Savannah is still pretty cranky about her meal being swapped from what she thought she was having to Indian.  She likes Indian, but when she is expecting one thing and gets another, grumpy girl.  She says the gravy is not good today.  I don't love the paneer there, on any given day, so it's OK - tastes no different - to me.  She decides after a small serving it really is too spicy and we role play the conversation of sending it back and asking them to add butter, which would kill some of the spice.  We both know how this is going to go.  We laugh.  I tell her I'll give it a shot but no promises.  The waiter comes.  "Hi, can you add butter, please?  Too spicy."  Blank stare.  I pick up the bowl, "Can you please add butter?  Inside."  "Oh, OK, hot." And he walks off.  Yeah... no.  Not warm it up, buddy.  Savannah and I shake our head.  It returns.  Bowl is hot.  I say, "No, please add butter."  Blank stare.  Another waiter joins us.  "Can you please put more butter?  This is too spicy for her."  "No, maam. Not spicy.  Sweet."  The sarcastic American is emerging. "Yes, I know it's sweet.  But let's add butter for fun.  Please put butter in here and stir it up."  Blank stare.  "Butter.  Do you have butter?"  "Yes, maam, this is your order."  "Yes, never mind.  I give up."  They exchange worried looks and I roll my eyes and turn back to Savannah.  "Sorry, Savannah.  Enjoy your sweet paneer butter masala."  She jokes about it tasting like chocolate and we deal.   
• She eats some of the biryani.  And she pops a wire on her braces.  Of course.  Because it's rice and chicken and there's absolutely no reason for that to happen.  But it does.  And we deal, again.
• Until I get sick.  Almost sick like Monday night heading into work.  I need the wash room and fast.  While I am gone, Savannah said they came by 5-6 times asking to take my plate.  Poor thing, because when I am back, I am ready to go.  Pack up the leftovers, take my plate and bring the bill.  I need to get out of there and to the office.  Still not feeling good at all, but would rather be at the office than stuck in the restaurant or the car.  We pay and leave.
• It begins to rain heading to the office.  I am not speaking, not playing on my phone, not doing anything but focusing on not being sick again.  Deep breaths, focus, focus, focus.  Repeat.  I can make it to the office.  I can and I will.  Repeat.  I do NOT want to be sick on the side of the road in the rain tonight.  Almost there, almost there.
• And we pull into the drive and I have to pop the door open right there.  Can't do it anymore.  The little bit of dinner I had is gone.  Twice.  And now I can cope.  Better.  So I apologize to Savannah and the driver and go into work.  Not feeling great, but I have a lot to do, so I'll fake it til I feel it.  I get in the lift and we get to the fifth floor and the power goes out.  The lift is stuck.  It's a good thing I emptied my stomach before I made it into the office.  God knew that was what needed to happen.  That could have been bad.  So we move the lift to 5th floor and it won't go anymore.  We swap to a side lift that seems to be working fine and I make my way to the twelfth floor.  
• It's a crazy night full of discussions and issues when I first get in, of course, because I am feeling awful and usually I get to read e mails for a while before I have to really speak with anyone.  The one night I need that downtime, and it's not there.  Ugh.  Oh, well.  About two hours in I feel better and survived the night.

So, that's our night in a nutshell.  Good times in Chennai.  Just to reiterate, I am ALMOST laughing now, and will laugh more later.  But, for the record, it's July 11 here and we will make a better start to this year.  Here's hoping your day was better than ours.  Hugs and prayers from India!

Nothing is Impossible!

"Through You I can do anything.  I can do all things.  

Because it's You who gives me strength." 

 These are some of the lyrics to a worship song that hit home a little more this week than it ever has in the past.  I didn't get to video our worship team today, although it included my kiddo playing her violin and surprising everyone with a little fiddle mixed in there, or else I would share this awesome song as performed by our Word of Life family (who rocked it, by the way!)  Since that didn't happen, I had to find another version that I liked a lot and found this one, as performed by Lakewood Church in Houston - nicely tied into my roots, huh? (click HERE). I have never visited Lakewood, but have heard lots of good things, and, ironically & completely unrelated, Joel Osteen's name came up in our service today. The more I focused on the lyrics today, while thinking that JULY 10 will be our one-year anniversary as Indian residents, the more my heart swelled with gratitude and, yes, I cried.  Shocking, I know.  I cried for a few reasons and although it's hard to enunciate the emotions that induced the tears, I'll try my best.

• Watching Savannah perform brings me a great sense of pride.  I think the amount of pride is increased exponentially because I know the challenges she has overcome in the past year that actually drive her to perform as an act of service, worship and praise for Jesus Christ.  And she's happy.  Psalm 127:3.
• Having never lived outside a 7-mile (11 KM) radius, moving across the world was a huge leap of faith.  I have never considered myself a courageous or brave person, but I will not disagree when someone says it takes a certain amount of courage to make a big move.  Fortunately, we have a BIG GOD who can provide all the courage and bravery we are lacking, and He has done just that many times in the past year.  Isaiah 41:10.
• We are so blessed.  We are blessed with wonderful family.  Living far away from my family has given me a whole new perspective.  Thankfully, I have not lost a close family member as an adult, but have often heard people say not to take it for granted that those you love will always be around and to make the most of your time together.  Living across and ocean and only getting a few weeks a year has helped me understand this idea.  We are blessed with awesome friends - old friends who keep in touch on FB or e mail, and new friends who have come into our life in the past year.  We are blessed with our health.  We are blessed with a nice place to live, clean water, electricity, in-home help, a car, a job, I can go on... We are blessed with a life-changing opportunity for us both. Deuteronomy 28:2.
• The past year has been filled with many challenges for us.  Emotional challenges.  Missing home, friends, family.  Culture shock.  During the same time I was experiencing culture shock, I was dealing with a broken heart, having broken up with Michael (obviously back together, but that was a rough few months).  Physical challenges.  Savannah and I don't look like Indians.  WHAT? you say...  Really! We are much whiter and much larger in stature.  We get lots of looks.  Some are kind and some are not.  We can't wear shorts or skirts here.  It's hot.  Shorts would be a nice change of pace, but would attract unnecessary negative attention.  Language challenges.  In the office and at school, English is predominantly spoken.  There are, however, several times every day that Tamil is used and we are uninformed, left out, or awkwardly standing by, waiting on our English translation.  Outside of the office and school and church, Tamil is the predominant language.  Food challenges.  Before I came to India I was a picky eater.  I am no longer picky and will try just about anything put in front of me these days (except seafood... still not big on much of that).  Savannah doesn't do spices very well.  Everything in Southern India is spicy.  We cope, but she has it rough sometimes.  Safety challenges.  In Chennai, I feel safe.  I am confident letting Savannah go with our driver, knowing he will go out of his way to keep her safe.  I don't have any issues walking somewhere (when it's not a zillion degrees outside) without an Indian friend or escort, so to speak.  We have not traveled outside of Chennai because I am unsure.  I am not confident that I will have the same level of safety for us... Time is winding down.  I need to find that courage and explore this country. Jeremiah 29:11.

I have learned so much over the past year.  I am and will be eternally grateful for the experience that has helped Savannah and me become more compassionate, understanding, open-minded and open-hearted.  I am excited about Savannah's time spent (past and future) teaching English at the orphanage, playing her violin with the worship team and helping with the kids at church.  We have made friendships and memories that will last for years to come.  I have great friends through work, she has made friends through school, we both have wonderful friends through church and even more friends through friends.  We will have tangible memories from our family holiday to Singapore & Malaysia, our article in the newspaper, and most recently, our voice-over dubbing for a Russian movie to American English.  A few of the things that, very likely, we never would have experienced in the US. 
I could write about the things that make me nuts or sad or angry over here: the crazy driving, cows in the road, frequent (most of the year, 2 hours per day) power cuts, lack of centralized shopping, inability to find reasonably priced and safe-to-consume beef, gender selection, treatment of women, corruption and bribery in the government, shockingly low salaries for so many jobs, disregard and disrespect for other peoples' time, oh... I could go on.  But I won't.  I refuse to focus on the negative.  Every now and then I have a day where it all boils over, but those are few and far between.  Fortunately, I have a few friends who I can really vent with and feel better.  Some understanding "been there, done that" or "still here, get that" friends.  It's a good feeling to be understood no matter where in the world we are, isn't it?  Job 12:13.

Continued thank you to all those praying for us and cheering us on through words and notes of encouragement.  My parents (twice!) and Michael coming to visit us help get us through the long months of missing home.  December is not too far away and we will be back to visit, then it will be this time next year.  What adventures await us?  What lessons will we be taught?  Who will make a special place in our heart forever?  Lots to see and do in the next year.  More challenges are on the way.  Fortunately, through Him, we can do anything...

"Nothing Is Impossible"
[Chorus]
Through You,
I can do anything,
I can do all things,
For it’s You who give me strength,
Nothing is impossible
Through You,
Blind eyes are opened,
Strongholds are broken,
I am living by faith,
Nothing is impossible!
[Verse]
I’m not gonna live by what I see,
I’m not gonna live by what I feel
[Pre-chorus]
Deep down I,
Know that You’re here with me
I know that, You can do anything
[Bridge]
I believe, I believe,
I believe, I believe in You

June has Come and Gone

I had intentions to write this a couple weeks ago.  And last weekend.  And last night.  All during the month of June.  The intention to write this before now is because July is such a significant month for us, and I didn't want to jump right over June.  In an effort to tell a short story, which we all know I always fail miserably at, I'll give the highlights of the past month.  Looking back, it was a month filled with significance for Savannah, as you will probably agree. 

• Savannah used her birthday money and purchased a TV, DVD player and teaching supplies for the Home of Hope Boy's Home orphanage where she's been volunteering.  She's been able to work with the boys on their conversational English a couple times this month, after a hiatus due to some nasty political issues that resulted in some Molotov bombs into civilian buses on the road to the home. She's happy to be spending time there again.
• Savannah got braces mid-month.  They are called lingual and are behind her teeth instead of in the front.  The cost is amazingly less here than in the US, and with some help from insurance, we decided this was a good option for her.  She got her top teeth done two weeks ago and goes back for her bottom on Tuesday.  She was in a lot of pain the first week, so would appreciate some prayers for her over the coming week to deal with the pain that will surely come.  She's a lot like her momma, in that she is pretty wimpy and has a very low tolerance for pain.
• The last of Savannah's big month is that she has joined the worship team at our Word of Life church and has played violin twice now.  She has always been shy about her violin, only playing in school functions, so this is a big step for my girl.  She has received lots of appreciation and praise from the church members after her first time playing, so it was good encouragement for her to play again.  She was great again tonight, but I might be a little biased. 
• Our last highlight of June was going to be kept under wraps... a little memento for us to take home and share with family and close friends, a fun memory of our time in Chennai.  A friend from church asked me to do an interview with her friend at a local paper.  They do a weekly profile on an expat in the area.  I am all about helping someone out, so I agreed without hesitation.  I assumed it was a small, community paper like the Houston Press or the insert like the "Spring/Woodlands" section of the Houston Chronicle.  I chatted with the friend, answered some interview questions, and send him a few pictures of Savannah and I during our time in Chennai.  Then I forgot about it because it wasn't going to run for over a week and my memory, as many of you know, is much shorter than that.  Fast forward to last Friday, June 21.  I wake up to a text (SMS, for my Indian friends) from my friend, Gideon, at ML Admin saying, "What Nikki? you're in the paper... you didn't tell me."  OK - no biggee.  Gideon reads all the expat stuff, nothing strange there.  When I got into the office, though, my email box was full of notes from friends in India and Houston, who had all read the article.  Seems the paper was a bit bigger than I assumed.  And Indians read the papers a lot more than Americans.  So........  since it's already out there, enjoy.  *The one thing I will note is that I mentioned the reason I am here is because I am following God's directive and that we would not be as acclimated and successful as we are without our church family and my American co-workers.  These things are important to me and I am a bit disappointed they weren't included.  

 So that's our month of June.  The month of July will be filled with mixed emotions.  I can already tell because they have been sneaking up for the past couple weeks.  The highs and the lows have come creeping into the memory bank and been a bit consuming.  I am sure the next blog will include all these things going through my head... Lucky you guys!

Savannah playing the violin at Word of Life church

Happy Canada Day to my Canadian friends and Happy Independence Day to my American friends and family!